Living Alone as an Older Woman is a Growing Trend
Living alone as an older woman.
The Growing Trend of Living Alone There is a growing trend in our world of women living alone. Often this is by choice with fewer women marrying and not having children. Sometimes it is the result of a divorce. Often women in their sixties are widowed. The trend of women living alone leaves many vulnerable and lonely. But the reality can also be empowering and positive.
The latest census data from Statistics Canada show that 68% of seniors who live alone are women, the vast majority of whom are quite happy with this arrangement.
The same trend is happening in America and Europe. More seniors who have a sexual or romantic partner don’t live together.
15 million single-person households were reported during the 1977 census, double the number in 1960. In 2016, there were an estimated 35.89 million single-person households in the U.S. – source
In this post, I will discuss the facts and the way that older women are shattering aging stereotypes and making of their lives as living alone, single and independent women.
There are sims to be two different spectrums on the subject of living alone as an older woman. There is loneliness and isolation and the difference between being isolated and depressed and really sad about being alone and the other spectrum edge which is ‘I love it!”
Being alone is my thing. I am an introverted and highly sensitive person, and I thoroughly love being alone.
Living alone is an OK thing.
You Can Be Alone Without Being Lonely
Being alone isn’t necessarily the same as being lonely.
Being alone simply means that you don’t have anyone else in your space, and you may be OK with that.
Being lonely is an entirely different matter and stems from an emotional state of feeling isolated. You may crave human company, but for whatever reason, it does not happen, and you are left with an empty feeling and longing for companionship.
Either through choice or circumstance, many of us at 50 or older are alone. But that doesn’t mean we feel lonely. Despite what dating companies would have you believe, not everyone needs another half, some of us are already complete.
Why So Many Older Women Love Living Alone?
Statistically women live longer and more of them will live alone. Most people male and female have trouble dating after 60.
There is a government bias against seniors’ marriage. Benefits are lower for couples and seniors who know it prefers to live alone.
Also once women live alone in midlife, they don’t want the experience to end.
In research done by the Journal of Population Research, Jianye Liu and his colleagues studied 6,675 people who were living alone when they were first contacted, and then followed up on their living situation for each of the next six years.
The most interesting result was this: The people more likely to continue living alone over the entire six-year period were the women.
It was as if they got a taste of a place of their own, they found that they really liked it. They no longer wanted to find someone to live with if they ever did.
As for me, I have been a widow for over a decade, and I have learned to cherish and guard my aloneness. There seems to be something very natural about living alone and the aging female brain.
Less fuss.
My very adult children live with me, so I am never isolated enough to feel a great deal of loneliness.
1. More women are financially independent.
Women are no longer tethered to husbands for economic life support.
Living alone as an older woman is a challenge because I am the only one that is contributing to the household income. I worked my whole adult life and now at 55 I am financially independent and can afford to live alone.
2. Living alone is also a question of self-protection for older women.
I raised my children as a single mother, looked after my ailing husband for six years, and don’t want to take care of anyone else, at least not full-time.
“Some women have looked after ailing husbands to the very end. And at some point, after they deal with their grief of losing a partner this way, they say, ‘Never again. I’m not doing that. I’m not doing anybody else’s dishes. I’m not doing his laundry. I’m not picking up anybody’s socks.'”
3. Women developed a tight social circle of friends and relations they can depend on.
We know that older men tend to be isolated. Women are the ones who organize get together, keep track of the kid’s and relatives’ birthdays.
We as older women created and maintain an interwoven circle of friends that we meet for lunch, book club, films – or just to have coffee.
According to the Pew Research Centre Americans, 65 and older were satisfied with the number of friends they had. Among those who lived alone, a much greater proportion of the women than the men said that they were satisfied, 71% vs. 48%.
Being good at friendship makes it easier to live alone and not feel isolated.
4. Women who live alone spend more time pursuing their interests and hobbies.
The same Pew survey asked participants if they were spending more time pursuing their interests and hobbies as they grew older. Among those living alone, a greater proportion of the women than the men said yes, 65% vs. 49%.
5. Women enjoy spending time alone.
I absolutely love living alone. Raised my kids. Have enough income to pay my bills. I only invite the people into my world that make life pleasant.
I didn’t have the type of male partners that I got to depend on over the years. Luckily, I guess.
I do what I want, when I want, I started learning about photography and blogging.
Here are some pointers to help you embrace solitude and find fulfillment in living alone as an older woman.
- Make new friends
- Take classes
- Join groups
- Be social
- Consider a pet
- Add structure to your day
- Get to know yourself
- Try new things
- Create your ideal space
Continue to seek enjoyment and adventure if you are able. Don’t stop at dinner parties and a new recipe – try planting a garden, join a hiking club, or learn to play an instrument.
Conclusion
Living alone is not for everyone. Sometimes you want someone to have a conversation with, or someone interested in what you are doing.
Do you live alone? Are you finding living alone a fulfilling and positive experience or a little lonely and depressing? Is living alone daunting or rewarding for you?
👇 Let me know in the comments!
Thanks for reading this article – I hope you found it helpful. As always, I’d love to hear from you! Have a fabulous week and take care! Irina Nikitina – Founder of Modern Fifty TV
Resources:
- Psychology Today “5 Reasons why so many women love living alone”
- Globe and Mail “Men want to live together; women don’t.”